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Dear Gabriel, Happy 35th Birthday, my love. I have so much to say, but really don’t know where to begin. Do you remember how I wished you a happy birthday upon your waking last year?                 “Happy birthday, babe… I’m in labor,” I told you.                 “Wait. Seriously?” You had been hoping for a birthday … Read moreA Letter to My Husband

Olivia had such a great time. And, so did I. Which, if you are just joining this journey, might sound silly to include. Of course I had fun. Gabe had fun. Aiden and Natalie had fun. Rachel and Jose had fun. Grandma had fun being up here with us. It was awesome! But I mean, … Read moreHalloween, Covid, and Cartwheels… Oh My!

Healing is such a messy trajectory! If I am going to advocate for maternal mental health, then that means being honest in the midst of the bad days. It is much easier to wait until the ugliness has passed to share about it, rather than invite you into the darkness, but that isn’t real. Today … Read moreOctober 12, 2020

Post by Becky Thompson He didn’t know he was marrying someone with a mental illness… Mostly because we had only known each other about five months when we got engaged. I was 18 when he put that ring onto my finger and asked if I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. I … Read moreOctober 10, 2020

In the darkness of my 12th night on the psych ward… Today was a difficult day. Truly, it began yesterday and spilled over into today. I’ve been doing really well with my postpartum depression, feeling much more like my normal self. So hitting a low point really swept me off my feet. I spent much … Read moreSeptember 13, 2020

Suicidal thoughts might sound something like this:   “I’m just so tired.” “I keep hoping I won’t wake up in the morning.” “This will never get better.” “I feel no joy.” “I want to disappear.” “Why can’t I just die?” “I’m so hopeless.” “I have no purpose.” “I wish something would happen to me so … Read moreSeptember 8, 2020

Maternal Suicide It’s astounding that the US does not report these rates; especially when in the postpartum period. I was almost a part of this group of statistics that don’t even exist. If we can’t acknowledge this is happening, how will treatment ever become more readily accessible? Moms are definitely not immune. The postpartum period … Read moreSeptember 7, 2020

Remembrance Wall I hate that this tribute has to exist. And yet it serves as an incredibly sobering reminder of the power of #PerinatalMoodandAnxietyDisorders (#pmads) and how your brain is altered. It’s hard to admit that I should be on this wall. BUT GOD.  I have an incredible tribe that came around me and ensured … Read moreAugust 2, 2020

Worship Yesterday afternoon, I woke up from a nap and turned on some worship. The sun was peaking through the blinds, and Olivia paused to hug her Daddy and listen. We (a tribe of people, including Jessica, AJ, and Mirm to name a few) have done almost-daily worship time with her since she was born; and … Read moreJuly 30, 2020

But God. This made me laugh and I had to reshare. If you have seen any of my story, you know that 2020 was a dumpster fire for me long before the world caught on!  But in all seriousness, this year has been about truly trusting the Lord, letting go, being still… In reference to … Read moreJuly 28, 2020